9. The King and I (1956)

The story of the King of Siam and Anna, his children’s governess, The King and I is one of the most engaging musicals, ever!  Anna (Deborah Kerr) and the King (Yul Brenner) are so incredible in these roles it’s hard to see anyone else in them. The relationship between the fiery monarch and his British nemesis is more like an irresistible force versus an immovable object than a personal relationship. His commanding presence and her respectful condescension, yet never quite bending to his will, is fascinating.

The King and I is a clever departure from the typical musical fare with bright costuming, exotic music and one of the best scores ever. Yul Brenner will forever be King Mongkut of Siam and Deborah Kerr his beautiful, charming foil.

Verdict: ✫ ✫ ✫ ✫

In Jurassic Park, people and bratty kids were dropped on an island, learned about genetics bringing extinct species back, and were chased by dinosaurs.

In Jurassic Park 2, people and one bratty kid were dropped on an island, chased dinosaurs, and dinosaurs were dropped in San Diego.

In Jurassic Park 3, people were dropped on an island looking for a bratty kid and were chased by dinosaurs.

Now, in Jurassic World, people and their bratty kids visit an island, spend lots of money on souvenirs, learn about genetics bringing extinct species back and get chased by dinosaurs.

The circle is complete.

Jurassic World is a vacationing theme park that I would have loved to visit. Everything I dreamed Jurassic Park would have been when I saw the first flick, this movie brings it to life! And you’re right there with all the tourists holding dino-shaped balloons and sipping soda from a Jurassic World cup, seeing the bored, young employees mumbling “Enjoy the ride.” with every flip of the switch, and watching Megalodon gobble sharks and saddled triceratops babies carry kids around in the petting/riding zoo. The luxury resort on the hill opens up its balconies to epic vistas of Isla Nublar that you never got to see in the first one. It’s awesome and fun! But behind the scenes, there’s always the corporation watching the bottom line, and focus groups’ figures show that people are getting tired of dinosaurs.

Time to make some new monsters! Enter Dr. Henry Wu (an older, more sophisticated looking BD Wong) the brilliant geneticist who’s been with In-Gen since Jurassic Park. A scientist without empathy or emotion, Dr. Wu loves gene-splicing and he’s so preoccupied with whether or not he could that he doesn’t stop to think if he should. Just like old times! This time around, the boss sent him an email that said, “Give me something bigger, cooler and with more teeth.”

M’okay. How’s Indominous Rex sound to ya? Bigger. Cooler. And much more teeth! Oh, and it’s highly intelligent and bound to give parents nightmares, let alone kids. Looks good on In-Gen’s quarterly statement, right? Unfortunately, no one in In-Gen’s corporate structure listens to the people who work closely with these animals… that they are animals and not just “assets”. So they’re all surprised, yet again, when the “assets” get out and start doing what they do best: hunt… eat… and be wild animals.

The problem is… it’s not any ordinary “asset” this time. It’s the Indomious Rex.

Jurassic World, directed by Colin Trevorrow (who didn’t have much on his resume when he was chosen to helm this ship) is a call back to the original movie that changed Hollywood forever. JP1 was an amazing movie, steered through science and the future of genetics, the danger of thinking we’re in control of Nature, all masterfully crafted by the hands of Steven Spielberg and Michael Crichton. Trevorrow forgets the second two movies even happened (thank God), pretty much accepts that Dr’s Malcom, Sattler and Grant never set foot in Jurassic Anything again and drops the movie 20 years after the events of JP1. There is no history of the second two movies ever having existed, however, there is lots of history harkening back to the first movie’s story, including Dr. Wu himself who has been busy in the lab. You’ll have a blast seeing some of the relics found in the “old park” as they call it.

In-Gen knows how to clean up after itself, that’s for sure. The problem is it keeps making messes. In-Gen security chief Vic Hoskins (I’ll always call him Gomer Pyle, Vincent D’Onofrio) struts around and grins like the guy you never want a cubicle next to, and pretty much figures the team of velociraptors that Owen Grady (Chris Pratt in full Indiana Jones mode) raised would be a perfect toy soldier in World War Three’s battlefield simply because they’re trained to do a few tricks. Meanwhile the park’s operations manager, Claire Dearing (an extremely perky but dangerously sharp Bryce Dallas Howard) has in mind that everything is under control with the push of a button or the call on a cell phone. She runs a taut ship and even dresses down an employee for wearing an old “Jurassic Park” shirt. This is a new era, after all, and it’s Jurassic WORLD now. Forget the past, this is the present. Everything’s different. We’re in control and the mistakes of the past are simply that.

Right? Right??

She’s amazing at running a park when everything works. Unfortunately, she’s not so ready for another mess and In-Gen is great at messes! That’s why they’ve got their own military ops division… to clean up messes. But even more unfortunately, this is no ordinary mess. They’ve created a monster… not a dinosaur. A monster with capabilities none of them were ready for because the genetic information it was created with is highly classified, even to the park’s owner. It’s bigger than they thought it’d be. It’s smarter than they thought it’d be. It never had a mommy or anything to cuddle it, and thus it knows nothing of nurturing. And now it’s out of its cage and racing across Isla Nublar killing everything.

This movie is a beautifully done popcorn monster flick with no apologies. All the thrills you got from the first movie are front and center and brought to the table differently. There are jump moments so be prepared! There are also softer parallel stories (the two boys whose parents are divorcing, the history and friction between Claire and Owen) that sort of act as glue to keep everything together. All in all, the movie is well balanced and paces smoothly.

A word on music, Michael Giacchino (Cloverfield, the new Star Treks and now Inside Out) took John Williams’ brilliant original score and kept it solidly original, including the fun flute notes and energetic melodies. It was like Mr. Williams never left the studio and was there smiling the whole time. I enjoyed it very much, not only for the sake of the movie’s pacing, but also for the nostalgia. I highly recommend just leaving JP 2 and 3 off your shelf and seeing 1 and 4 instead!

Verdict: ★ ★ ★ 1/2

They say that legends begin with normal people who believe in themselves, and that’s how this interesting take on one of history’s greatest heroes is told. The stories of the mighty Hercules (Dwayne Johnson) are told far and wide thanks to his nephew, the bard Iolaus (Reece Ritchie) whose silver tongued tales turn farmers into armies.

However, as it’s quickly revealed, the stories are just that… stories. Hercules is a powerful mercenary and also relies on the support of his elite team of fellow mercenaries to keep getting hired by kings for impossible missions. Amphiaraus the seer (Ian McShane and his awesome voice), Autolycus (Rufus Sewell), Tydeus (Aksel Hennie) and the Amazon Atalanta (Ingrid Bolsø Berdal) round out his team of badasses as they are hired on by Lord Cotys (a spectacular John Hurt) to help defend the land from an rival lord bent on takeover.

Turns out, there’s always more than meets the eye on just about every level!

Hercules was a surprisingly smart movie, immersed in the sort of action packed, Greek desert set piece world as Conan the Barbarian but with much more thought. The characters were shallow archetypes… mindless warriors, storytellers who want to prove their own strength, sniper level bow carrying Amazon women, kings with deceitful plans and lots of gold, generals with grudges. And yet, every character in this movie had a depth that leaves the viewer satisfied.

The actors took what they had and gave it their all. Without this level of superior acting, this movie would certainly have been flushed by my friends over at Soiled Restroom Cinema sooner or later! But Brett Ratner’s direction behind the helm made Hercules work very well, and I enjoyed every moment of it.

My favorite in this one had to be (hands down) Ian McShane, who both narrated the movie and provided most of the humor. His voice is to die for but aside from that, he was enjoyable in every scene. Pictured above in one of the coolest scenes of the movie, he is a “seer” who saw his own death by fiery arrow and awaits it in every battle scene, having made peace with his impending doom. However, he continues to be disappointed and the way he reacts is hilarious every. single. time!

General Sitacles (Peter Mullan, the gray haired, pony tailed death eater Yaxley inHarry Potter 7) is appropriately badass, another deep gravel voiced, no nonsense dude I enjoy very much.

All in all, I found the movie worth seeing at least once for the sake of having a refreshing take on the Greek legend, and came away smiling.

Verdict: ✫✫✫

Odd Thomas, a character created by Dean Koontz that spans several novels and a movie directed by Stephen Sommers (the guy behind GI Joe and The Mummy trilogy)… words I’d use to describe this flick: Fast. Humorous. A little sexy here and there. Dialogue straight out of a comic. Surprisingly serious in parts, for all the quirkiness of the flick. An ending I didn’t expect at all.

Odd (yes, that’s his real name because of a screw up on his birth cert, played by Anton Yelchin) and his girlfriend Stormy (a heart-breakingly adorable Addison Timlin) have an interesting relationship. Odd is a psychic investigator who can see the dead. And when I say “investigator” I mean “other worldly special forces agent with a kung fu grip”.

These two are a couple of badasses who grew up together, understand and enjoy each other thoroughly. That said, Armageddon is coming to Pico Mundo, Arizona and the signs are catapulting around every turn in front of Odd like giant red banners. A murder needs investigating, a suspect needs following and a shit load of demons need to be used to help him triangulate the cause of this impending destruction. All hell seems to break loose right on time but who or what is behind it?

All in all, I enjoyed this flick. It was campy and fun about as much as eating great Chinese food with a girl who makes you laugh from deep down in the gut. The chemistry between the characters was on the shallow end, but it’s still cool in the pool and this goofy, gumshoe mystery-thriller with a sci fi twist was a blast to watch. Definitely worth a buck at the box! Heck, I might even check out the first of those novels.

10. Grease (1978)

Of course it has to be on the list, it’s Grease. John Travolta, Olivia Newton John and Stockard Channing, all geriatric teenagers, lead an all-star cast, of funny, charming and talented actors in a great musical tribute. Originally a great stage production, Grease stands as one of the most successful musicals of all time. The movie although “differently” cast, and tame compared to the 1971 original, manages to be funny, entertaining and a blast. You should take some time and listen to the original risque soundtrack, if you get a chance. It’s worth it.

The cast, a mixture of “A” and “B” list actors includes such famous comedic actors as Sid Caesar, Eve Arden, Didi Conn, Joan Blondell and Dody Goodman, all stars in their day, and at their best. There are few Heartthrobs: Frankie Avalon and Lorenzo Lamas, and a collection of “teenagers” bring fun and frivolity to a dynamite film. The score is legendary, the plot simple but great and story elements that make this one of America’s best.

Verdict: ★ ★ ★ 1/2

When you go to a Rock movie, it’s pretty much assured you’re going to see the same stern eyed, tough talking, bleached toothed, wildebeest-girthed badass you see in every other Rock movie who does impossible feats of absolute craziness in every bulldozing, car jumping, people screaming, concrete smashing action scene.

Well… this is not that kind of Rock movie.

San Andreas surprised me with how different it is from the trailers that sold it. It’s a very well toned, nicely balanced instructional earthquake video that starts off with an oddly “out of place” 7+ richtor scale earthquake in Nevada which Cal Tech seismologists led by Dr. Lawrence Hayes (Paul Giamatti) test a theory of magnetic prediction against. Apparently a few hours before an earthquake happens, the earth lets out a high magnetic field or something scientific like that. Omg! That’s awesome! Earthquake predictions! Wait. Um. Dr Hayes? The magnetic field is off the charts… OMG! Get out of there!

>Fa FOOM!!<

A quake that tears apart Hoover Dam like it was wet Kleenex erupts and according to what their laptops are telling them, it’s a precursor to the San Andreas faultline letting off some steam… or magnetic force… or something. All this is explained to us as our Cal Tech geeks run from crumbling concrete and jump over suddenly opening fissures.

That’s cool by me. Action while learning science rocks! Speaking of rock, LAFD heli-rescue pilot Chief Ray Gains (Dwayne Johnson) in about to sign divorce papers that his wife Emma (Carla Gugino) sent him in an oddly reminiscent Twister plot device when suddenly they’re brought back together after he rescues her from the top of that building we all see in the trailer. Almost immediately they get a call from their only daughter Blake (Alexandra Daddario) who is in San Francisco which is just where the San Andreas faultline crawls out of the Pacific. And, just like her mom and dad, she thinks fast on her feet in tight situations.

Thankfully, the almost bland flavor of family drama that threatens to derail the entire movie doesn’t, and we’re catapulted into the action of earthquakes rocking the west coast. The two female leads (Gugino & Daddario) as well as the two male leads (Johnson & Giamatti) all bring their A-game and offer strong, confident acting. Left behind are the weak damsels in distress and stepping forward are the ladies taking charge and saving lives. And the men are appropriately badass while maintaining the emotional pull necessary to be real human beings and not just plastic action heroes. Unfortunately you don’t see that in the trailer, which kind of pissed me off.

Screenwriter Carlton Cuse said it best when he said, “Part of the construct was making sure that each character had a mission and something that they were trying to accomplish. Alexandra’s character wasn’t just waiting around to be rescued. Carla wasn’t just a passive participant in Dwayne’s journey. I was trying to find those ways in which each character can express their heroism as an essential concept.”
Source: http://collider.com/san-andreas-movie-18-things-to-know-about-dwayne-johnson-disaster-movie/ (spoilers in article)

However, what the trailers (probably put together by studio execs) show and what the movie actually is, are completely opposite. Mr. Cuse’s thoughts about what he was trying to do with the female characters in the movie are completely opposite of what everyone saw in the trailers: Blake was waiting around to be rescued and Emma was just a passive participant in Dwayne’s journey.

What the artists who have actually applied the paint to the canvas are showing us, is different than what the suits making the deal are selling it as and that infuriates me. Because 1) most people aren’t going to see the movie based on what the artists wanted us to see. If they see it at all, they’re going to see it because of what the execs thought we would want to see. And 2) it just shows yet again that studio execs have no possible clue what people actually enjoy in art. Heroism is one thing, but strong female leads are awesome and we are woefully lacking of those in Hollywood. This movie is refreshingly bursting with strong female characters who aren’t waiting around for men to save them, like the trailers unfortunately portray.

In conclusion, San Andreas isn’t the movie you saw in the trailer. It’s a smart, easily flowing disaster movie with a strong cast who know how to make the audience feel safe and aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty, all while allowing the tenderness of being human shine brightly.

Hey everyone! Grab your bathing suit, your boxers or briefs or just your birthday suit and jump in. We at Movie Madness are taking the Hot Tub Time Machine back to 1984. Doug, Mr. Jeremy and me, the Movie Maniac, are heading back to choose the best movies of the year. 1984 was a great year for movies, but not just the ones about which you’ve heard.

Doug and I came up with movies that surprised both of us, and I think, scared Jeremy. But guess what? You will never know unless you tune in and listen. Remember, we want your own favorites so we can announce them on the podcast, so listen and then leave your comments at: moviemadnesspodcast@gmail.com or call the voice mail # 260-573-0015 or post them to Twitter, Facebook or the Ultimate Movie Geeks community on Google+

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Devoid of laughter, ripe with female stereotypes and with no relationship between the characters, Hot Pursuit is a black hole of comedy. All of the life seems to be sucked out of it. Reese Witherspoon and Sophia Vergara, in a buddy movie, seems a natural. Unfortunately there’s not a hint of a connection between them.  The characters are extremely exaggerated (not in a good way) and the dialogue is some of the worst I’ve heard.

I’m blaming this almost entirely on a poor choice of directors. There are plenty of great buddy movie directors and any of them would have been a better choice than Anne Fletcher. The director of such great action films as 27 Dresses and The Proposal (tongue stuck firmly in cheek), does not belong at the helm. The film plays more like Mean Girls than The Odd Couple. I was definitely looking forward to a female version of the latter.

Wiitherspoon plays Cooper, an unlikeable female Barney Fife-like character (hard to imagine) and Vergara is Daniella Riva, a drug lord’s shrewish wife. Vergara’s husband is testifying against his boss and Cooper is charged with getting he and his wife to court. The plot was good and could have been fun, but the characters are so incredibly annoying Hot Pursuit falls flat.

This film just doesn’t work. The writing is stilted, at best. The direction doesn’t make any sense. Why would you not want the audience to root for the Cooper and Riva? Both seemed clueless and uninteresting and I could have cared less. Even the villains were bland and generic. I would miss this movie like avoiding a zombie locked in an outhouse. Why bother. It’s just not worth the trouble.

Rating: .5 out of five stars

Verdict: ★★★★

So my wife was cruising RedBox and found this movie, gave me a look like, “You wanna?” and I gave her a look like, “I’d rather eat blue stained glass from the Rose Window.” but being a good husband, I masked the look with, “Of course dear!”

I fully expected this movie to be another one of those We’re Having A Baby movies where the entire focus is on the mother to be and the goofy-go-lucky daddy stumbles over his own feet, panics through most of the movie, says the wrong thing all the time and is treated like a total idiot for “laughs”, and in the end the baby is born and all’s well that end’s well, credits roll.
(sighs)

That didn’t happen here, thank goodness. Despite the all-female movie cover, as if mommies were the only ones ever present during a pregnancy, this is a movie that is balanced between the mommy and the daddy… or in this case, the several mommies and daddies. I know, right?? What’s this? Equality between the genders? Oh em gee!

In WTEWYE‘ing, we follow several couples in their various states of relationship from conception to birth, each relationship as different as the couples who lived it and each path as hilarious and beautiful as life itself. I mentioned balance, and I meant that… I honestly couldn’t have made it through this movie without the help of the Dudes Group (seen above). These guys were worth the time it took to sit through this flick alone! Every time they showed up on screen, my head was back, my open mouth, my teeth showing as I laughed my ass off!

I definitely recommend this movie. It’s real (despite Cameron Diaz and J Lo starring in it), it’s moving and it will keep you smiling throughout the entire thing! Being a daddy of two, I can personally testify to the memories this movie brought back, and some I’m still living through.

11. Chicago (2002)

Based on the award winning Broadway musical and with some of the more prolific Hollywood stars: Richard Gere, Katherine Zeta Jones and Renee Zellweger. Chicago sprung on the screen with a bang, literally.

The film, centered in the prohibition, era focuses on Zellweger, a cold as ice heartless killer, sentenced to death and rightly so.  Successful for several reasons: the score is great, superlative acting by the entire cast and stunningly good performances by John C. Reilly and Richard Gere mark the film as one of the best. The exceptional cinematography tops the charts and adds a little cherry to the dark chocolate sundae that is Chicago.